I've worked at iconic Silicon Valley companies, struggling nonprofits, universities, and, yes, a factory. I’ve survived acquisitions, downturns, trade shows, and three IPOs. I’ve observed bad behavior, crummy managers, and poor decision making; I’ve been swept up in world-changing corporate missions and seen humility and kindness at all levels of a company. I’ve cried at work and been forever changed by my jobs. Let’s kibitz.
I’m a woman in my mid-30s, running a product team at a big software company. I come from an operational and business background—not a technical one. I get on well with the development team: we ship products successfully and they view me as a good leader. I’ve done this same kind of job at two well-known companies. But now I’ve been told by our head of product that I’m not “technical” enough and that I have to find another job in the company or leave. This has left me feeling freaked out and angry. I’m mid-career, and can’t stop life to go get a technical education. And I resent that this decision is being brought on from on high. What should I do?

In a word, oy.

Any business that’s led by technologists usually prioritizes developers and engineers. Which does make sense: what they do matters most to the business, even as all the other functions at the company grow to support their work. It’s possible you were tapped to lead the team because, at the time, there wasn’t a technical lead who wanted to opt out of building a product to manage the process.

That often happens in the early days of a software business. In the early years of Google, for instance, when the company had fewer products and less process, the criteria for managing product was looser. Then there came a day when Google got bigger and everything got stricter; all product managers were required to have a computer science degree or an equivalent.

I’m assuming the mandate came from higher up — perhaps above the head of product — which is another reason you may have no recourse. But it’s certainly worth pursuing an explanation so you fully understand what’s going on. First, does this edict apply across all products, or just yours? (The former would imply that the company’s changing; the latter might be a message to you personally.) If it’s a company policy, it’s worth marshaling your technical fans across your teams to have them weigh in with a vote of confidence.

This should not be a heavy-handed Tracy Flick-style campaign, but a quiet effort to whomever has declared the shift. And since you’re a woman, it may be worth your time to speak to your HR business partner, or the head of diversity, to make them aware of this “new rule.” It seems likely that this mandate will remove women managers from technical teams — and that, I assure you, runs counter to whatever your company is doing to help women in technical management. It wouldn’t be the first time that HR (or legal) puts the kibosh on a poorly considered blanket ruling that neglects to take all employees into account. Good luck with your fact finding.

I was hired at a hot startup to work with top execs on their presentations, speeches, op-eds, commentaries, et cetera, in an executive communications role. I thought I was doing good work, and reported to our group VP, when suddenly I was leveled down. Now I report to a guy with no executive comms experience, who reports to that same VP. My new manager doesn’t seem to care what I was hired to do, and my earlier assignments have been farmed out to others on the team. When I met with my manager to ask what I should be doing — I even asked flat-out if they want me to leave — he assured me that “everything’s fine, we value you. It’s just that our needs have changed.” So I have no assignments and no clear responsibility, but no signal that I should go. I can’t take much more gaslighting — help!

Oh, the curse of leveling — that method of torture fast-growing companies use to demoralize their own people. (OK, maybe it wasn’t explicitly designed for that purpose.) Leveling, part of the endless fun known as a reorg, happens when new people are hired to build part of the business and existing people change their reports. I was once leveled down to be managed by someone who needed “credit” for managing people in order to become a director, which was his real goal. Needless to say, that burned.

You’re in tricky territory; it seems unlikely you’ll be able to get a straight story out of anyone in the know. I didn’t find out the politics behind my own leveling down until years later, when the guy who managed our group confessed to me why I’d been shuffled. The VP who hired you has clearly delegated you away, and (probably) doesn’t want to delve into the reasons with you. Your current manager may know of a new strategic initiative but can’t share it. HR will never acknowledge that someone like you is being starved out in hopes that you’ll leave. Trying to get you to quit carries ethical, if not legal, complexity.

I’ve had several friends who have suffered through this “you’re no longer a fit” setup, and in each case the starve-out happened, essentially, because other people were already in place to take over, and the incumbent’s skills were seen as not compelling enough to figure out another configuration. The main thrust of this approach (as wrongheaded as it is): we hope you figure it out and move on soon.

What’s odd in your case is that no one is telling you that your team has changed direction — the kind of talk that would give you an incentive to recommit, or start looking around. It’s the non-message that’s so maddening.

I’m pretty sure you won’t get any satisfaction in sorting it out. But in the interest of confirming what’s going on, here goes. It’s worth trying to get together with the VP who originally brought you in for a candid moment — ideally, over an informal coffee instead of behind closed office doors. Be as calm and clear as possible about the changes you’ve observed, and ask what’s up. This is not a performance review, so don’t ask about how you’re doing or if they’re unhappy. I don’t think you should expect any admission that they do want you to leave — any VP worth their salt is not going to go there. You want to stress that you’d like to understand the situation and that you would like to continue offering your skills to a company you believe in. Keep it positive and short; don’t beg.

Of course, it’s possible this VP is unaware of the treatment you’re getting from your manager, and the positive attitude you project may help to enlighten and get you back in gear. But given what you’ve said, I’d be prepared to get very little information. You should put the best possible face on the work you did do, keep your thoughts to yourself, and feature your contributions to the company clearly on your refreshed LinkedIn profile, which will soon attract many recruiters.

I’m an experienced business development guy, working at a platform company that has a global footprint and dozens of mobiles carrier deals. In other words, I oversee the team that gets our products around the world on millions of devices. As a senior director, I bring in millions of dollars of revenue and manage an international group of partnership pros. The problem? My VP-level manager only manages up: She takes credit for all of my team’s work at the executive level, and makes it seem like it’s all due to her. This isn’t me being paranoid; I’ve been in meetings where she presents my results with no meaningful shout-out to anyone involved. She’s the type who puts a happy face on every encounter, and I don’t think a confrontation would work. I could go elsewhere, but have spent the last few years building up this business, and hate to walk away now. Beyond suffering in silence, what can I do?

You’ve come across one of life’s impenetrable questions: why are so many managers better at managing up than down. Surely there should be a test for both! At any rate, I have a couple of suggestions. One, are you able to independently build up your own public profile via speaking gigs, panels, opinion pieces and so on? If it hasn’t been broached before, make fast friends with your PR team. They are always looking for more spokespeople to put out, as the executive set is usually very small and picky about what they will do. The more you can develop a public persona for yourself as an expert in your field, with accomplishments to your name, the better off you will be when looking for your next gig — which I predict you will heading off to before long.

Of course, you’ll need some allies for this strategy, and that’s where your PR friends come in to help deliver the message. There are too many partner events for her to do them all. If you can make it seem like you’re doing her a favor by taking these pesky invitations off her hands, so much the better.

If you attempt a candid chat, use her happy talk to your advantage. No complaining! Your positive message goes like this: “You do so much for us at the executive level. Let me help you give our accomplishments and plans to the leadership — you shouldn’t have to bother with putting that together.” In theory she will like this approach, thinking she gets to shine while you do the work (as usual). The difference is that the execs now have a chance to discern that you are the one driving the business. Even if they don’t act immediately, people tend to remember who the substantive stars are for future planning.

Irritated by misguided company culture and hapless co-workers? Send your professional quandaries to me via advice@backchannel.com