How to Kill Your Boss
Released on 08/21/2013
(gentle music)
(clicking)
(beeping)
(phones rings)
Antivirus Cyber Warfare Specialist Topple.
Well, that sounds impressive.
No, just getting in the right frame of mind for the job.
Hey, Let's order pizza like the hackers on TV do.
I have some bad news about that.
About the pizza?
No.
Don't tell me we've already stopped
the North Korean virus.
I was so into that.
I spoke to Deputy Chief Rollins
about your involvement in the project.
Now why would you do that?
Rollins detests me,
never forgave me for the mess I made at that key party.
Yeah, he's not a fan.
His wife is though.
She loves a mess.
Now, Rollins says he doesn't want you
within 30,000 miles of the project.
30,000 miles?
That's bigger than the circumference of the earth.
I bet he's exaggerating.
He doesn't think your skillset
is optimized for cyber security.
[Topple] His wife does though.
That doesn't make any sense.
I'm just trying to work up a catch phrase.
I'm supposed to give you some busy work
while I crack the stacks nutcase.
How are you collating?
This is preposterous.
Who is Rollins to tell me what I can and cannot work on.
You know, I can count the number of enemies his killed
on one hand.
And that hand doesn't even have fingers.
Get it?
Yeah.
He's never killed anyone.
Do you know what we call agents
who've never killed anyone in this business?
Well-adjusted?
Fingerless hands men.
And you're such a big badass.
Damn straight I am.
If you had to count all the foreign agents I've taken out,
you need a lot of hands, multiple hands.
You remember hands across America?
No.
That's not enough hands.
I can't disobey Deputy Chief Rollins.
I'm offended my kills count for nothing
in this agency anymore.
One a upon a time in this country,
the number of people you'd murdered with your own hands
was a sign of your virtue.
Now it's all about how many spreadsheets you manage,
or how many Twitter followers you have.
Have you heard of this, this Twitter.com?
I looked at it yesterday.
They should call it endlessstreamofbullshit.com.
Well, you can reminisce about all the people you've killed
while you collate files for me.
It used to be whenever someone turned up dead,
I get a pat on the back.
Good old Topple, taking care of business.
Another enemy killed, attaboy.
Topple, keep them coming, Topple.
Kill, kill, kill!
Topple the unstoppable, the murder machine,
the death dealer.
Hold on, I got an alert.
Sure, I'll take a life without thinking, what do I care?
Oh my god.
Basically, if you ever hear of someone dying
under mysterious circumstances, that was me.
Deputy Chief Rollins has been killed.
Oh.
Well, this is certainly awkward.
You know, I ought to go comfort his widow
in her time of need.
Starring: John Hodgman, Emily Heller
Co-creators: David Rees and Brian Spinks
Animation: Flat Black Films
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