(piano notes) (synth chord)

(keys typing) (steam whistle)

So I'm watching this new series, Atlantis on BBC America

and it is ludicrous.

(intense music) (arrow whips through air)

The premise, a modern-day dude named Jason,

oh, I see what you did there,

gets transported to the fantastical realm, pre-immersion,

where he battles a Minotaur, pals around

with the mythical demigod, Hercules

and the non-mythical mathematician, Pythagoras.

Tell 'im about Non-Euclidean geometry, Jason.

He'll totally soil his toga.

Is it nonsense?

Sure.

Will I stop watching?

Absolutely not.

Greek mythology is just inherently great TV.

You got swords, sorcery, superhuman feats

of strength and agility, giant monsters, power plays

between deceitful gods.

It's bullet-proof material

that even a $75 per episode effects budget can't ruin.

Which makes me wonder.

(retro funky music)

(thunder cracks)

Why is it so hard to get a series based

on Wonder Woman off the ground?

She's only the most famous female comic book character,

ever.

An Amazonian warrior princess from Greek mythology.

Get what I'm saying?

She has magic bracelets that repel bullets.

(bullets ricocheting)

And a magical golden lariat of truth.

(rope whipping through air)

(whip cracking)

You must now tell the truth.

Let's just run this down.

TV audiences love mythological heroes.

(wood bashing face) (man groans)

(yells)

TV audiences love kick-ass lady protagonists.

TV audiences love comic book characters,

given the right twists

and slash fic writers love

that Wonder Woman gets captured and tied up a lot.

So, when was the last live-action Wonder Woman on the air?

(epic music) (man groans)

Sorry Lynda Carter,

but that show was a cheesecake, cheese-fest.

In 2011, a Wonder Woman series

on The CW didn't make it past the pilot.

An NBC series in 2012 didn't even make it

off the drawing board.

Oh, and don't even get me started

on Joss Whedon's canceled movie adaptation.

Have you read the script online?

It's better than The Avengers.

Absolutely ridiculous.

Now, yes it's true that Zack Snyder just cast Gal Gadot

as the Amazonian princess for a supporting role

in Superman Vs Batman, but why not Gina Carano?

Or Beyonce?

And, presumably, Wonder Woman will be

in the Justice League movie,

but Wondy could carry a project on her own.

(growls)

I wish I could lasso all of those dunderheaded TV execs,

with a golden lariat of truth and make them tell me,

how they managed to fail with can't-fail material.

Maybe if I sacrifice a few araxa to Zeus,

he'll send down some lightening bolts

to get the show out of turn-around.

Shazam! (thunder cracks)

Wrong lightening bolt.

(synth note)

What superhero do you like to dress up as?

Let me know in the comments.

Who do you think could play Wonder Woman

in the upcoming TV series that someone should be making?

Let me know in the comments

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